Why should we take care of the relationship even after years?

20/06/2018


Once upon a time, two young people met each other. They immediately fell in love with each other, they didn´t have to conceal their feelings behind a false mask. Everything was pure and beautiful, and the feelings between them were obvious. Once they have kissed under the cherry tree, another time under the maypole, they were fed enough with their love. There was no need of water or wine or blankets when it was cold outside. Very long months they have looked at each other like a newborn baby staring at azure sky. Although there have sometimes appeared stormy clouds, the sky has been without them in a moment, it has been sunshine again, and the joy has been carried in the wind.


Why was it all so beautiful? Because their relationship was clear to them. They did not hide anything, they told everything to each other, therefore the relationship was so nice. They were respecting each other and were trying to listen to each other.


A couple of years passed, and at the mutual reconciliation as if the dark cloud sat. They have not been unfaithful to each other; on the contrary, there still has been some sort of reconciliation. There has been a lack of mutual communication and understanding only, and without that there is not any loving couple so far anymore. When we buy a plant, it is necessary to get the soil and cultivate it every day, otherwise it would start to fade. The same is in the relationship, not just the beginning needs a loving effort. But if the significant other is not worth of our effort and we have a double measurement on him and us as well, it's not the right partner we should be with, and live a happy life together. If remain with someone from the whims only, probably his presence does not give us a right drive. If we remain with someone just because we are afraid of loneliness, we might be ending with the temper of despot.


Now everyone, think about with whom you really live your life? With each of his (her) words, do you roll up your eyes or laugh? And how does really that relationship look like? It blooms or fades? And why is that so? You probably do not laugh enough together. Each of you lives with your own live, while should form one team. Go along together in health and illness, keep long debates up to the night. Hold your hands in good or bad times and honor each other´s features. After all, that was the thing in the beginning for which you made common selfies to memorize it. So where has the mistake occurred? Maybe you do not drink enough wine... :) You probably stopped to communicate with each other, so you should have organized one good evening. Put away your phones and bad thoughts and stop giving yourselves permanent puzzles to solve.... how does it feel? What is wrong with him? Why does he get stuck all the time? Do not guess and speak up about what's bothering the significant other more. Perhaps you will eventually find out that even single problem can have a lot of solutions. And if you recognize that the person sitting across from you is worth all the time, so water it like a flower every day, so one day you will not find faded leaves only.


It is not always easy to smile at each other every day, sometimes you will want to faint from the anger. But if there is a larger part with partner beautiful, do not throw away the signals of true love. If you love most of his soul, somewhere else you might find out that many things matter to you too. And just as you would like your partner to treat you, do not let him to walk on that journey of friendliness all alone. Do not break the relationship at the first failure, you can only get rid of the problem together, old-fashioned way. By honesty and communication, not to be tortuous to each other. Strong relationships are made by obstacles, not just beautiful gifts and luxury damasks. Endurance and effort, these are keys to life's well-being. Fight with all your strength to make your relationship a good one, remember what you loved at the beginning and where you hid this love so deeply. Try to find it and meet yourself, if it does not get any better, it will not probably remain anything to you. In such cases, it is good to split your paths and allow the heart to heal for a while. And over the time allow yourself and your significant other to fall in love for another person. If you have already depleted all your options, let each other go and do not grow up any anger in yourself. Let her go away and wait for someone else to fit like a key to you. Then you will find someone who will have many of the attributes you like.


If you found someone like that, do not forget that even here the roads are sometimes dusty. But you can take the broom and clean the path and sort things by its importance. Those banalities throw far away and forget about ego in dealing with those important.
Before you drop a flammable lava on your relationship, give it a chance first. By your own fault you might destroy the possible chance that you both needed for mutual dance. So, love yourself with all your soul and heart, because life desires beautiful things. And it will run under your hands so quickly that in the case of wrong step one will just sigh. And at the end you will vainly look for a shoulder, because it was just unwelcomed from a pride. And out of frustration you have thrown it over the deck and now you have to look into the glass for just one pair of teeth :)


Katka_H